So apparently my attempts at coversion didn't work out so well. Suspicions abounds, and now I guess it's time for something of an official capacity.
Several years ago, Jeff and I decided to try to conceive. The one and only time I actually achieved it, I had lost it almost as fast as I'd found out. From then on I had no luck. As time went by my likelihood of being fertile at all were coming into question.
So when fertility treatments weren't an option, we knew it wasn't in the cards for us. I knew deep down, that having a child of my own would not be possible, the doctor suggested I try to regain my health and try again. Somewhere inside me had already broken. I knew it wouldn't happen, but I didn't see any fault to getting healthy. If Jeff and I adopted, it would be good to have my health.
I turned to reading and writing to get my mind off the morbid fact. Just seeing children or pregnant women would send me in a spiral of sadness. So I've read countless books and I'm writing a series of books, the first of which will be done in a few months, and another book in the works. All in an attempt to escape the harsh reality.
Four months and 60 pounds later, the side effects of a certain medication were a bit much, and since I knew it wouldn't happen anyway, I stopped taking it. A little over 6 weeks later I had a problem.
A new set of side effects that I had no idea of the cause. I knew what the doctor would ask, so I wanted to be proactive, rule it out, and then find out what the problem was.
I thought the big line was the control line. Nope. I had a positive pregnancy test. I took it again that night. Same thing. I went to the doctor and had it confirmed. Such a tiny thing already with a heartbeat. Fast forward to 4 weeks later and the baby is still fine, sleeping away with a bpm of 150.
So without further ado, I give you our little Pickle, due to arrive December 11th, 2010.
Please spread the word.
